Communication

“Your most important friendships should be with your own brothers and sisters and with your father and mother. Love your family. Be loyal to them. Have a genuine concern for your brothers and sisters. Help carry their load so you can say, like the lyrics of the song, ‘He ain't heavy; he’s my brother.”

I wish I could tell you my brothers and sisters are my most important friendships, but they are not. My best friend is my mother. I have been close with her since day one. It is different when you have a combined family it’s just not the same as a normal family. In my opinion, it has always been split since my parents got married the step kids as a group, and my side as a group. We did not get along and we still struggle to get along. There are some very strong personalities and opinions about the whole combined family and marriage. To me, it has never felt like we have come together as a whole loving family combined. My parents raised us right and did the best they could do. But now since everyone is out and on their own now things have changed. They have their own family and kids to care for and love for and the communication between us is little. I have my loving mother who cares and loves me very much and always keeps in touch. When I was in high school my dad worked all day every day and my mom was a stay-at-home mother. So, I and my mom did things shopping, eating out, movies you name it we did it. Especially when I was the only one left in the house is relationship went even closer, I would tell her everything. I trusted her and relied on her. She was there through the thick and thin. She has shown me that your best friend should be your husband. I agree 100% and want that in my future marriage.

Communication is key in any relationship. My parents are a bad example of effective communication. They have struggled with that for a very long time. My mom never answers the phone or responds to texts. My dad is the same way, and they can never decide on a decision. It has caused a lot of problems with my siblings and extended family. For example, we always go to this water slide before the Fourth of July it is a big family get-together party. Well, my parents are the ones that get the group texts for everything when it comes to this kind of stuff. They are awful at telling their kids about it and what is going on. This has happened over and over because they don’t communicate. Trust me my whole family knows this. It had caused a lot of hard aches and problems throughout the years. Just like the other day they forget to inform us about a family reunion and my sister blew up and was very frustrated.

In class, we talked about the negative effects of lack of communication. Some outcomes are higher physiological arousal, wife compliance, either being defensive or stubborn, longer arguments without exiting, and a pattern of wife demand and husband withdrawal. Lack of communication can eventually destroy a marriage. It is not health I have seen it with my own eyes. What starts out as a little I forgot to tell you ends in a huge fight and walking out it’s not good. I have learned to be an effective communicator through my jobs and relationships. You need to communicate verbally how you feel and what is going on to get the job done. “Lack of communication ruins everything because instead of knowing how the other person is feeling, we just assume.